Under A Lie

I hadn't realized what I was doing these past 3 weeks. What on earth was I thinking? Who did i think I was listening to? Did I think that those voices were God? Did I really feel free from spiritual warfare. It was the Father of Lies talking to me. He spoke to me even through the sermon and disguised himself as the Holy Spirit. He had me crawling on my hands and feet, desperately trying to earn my way into heaven. He had me thinking that I didn't even have a Holy Spirit. He had me thinking that I was dead on the inside and just surrounded by living souls. He told me that I was the worst type of man. He told me that I couldn't wait...that the world would leave me behind. He told me that I couldn't even come clean before the almighty God. He fooled me into thinking that I'm not saved; he told me that I have to earn my way to heaven and that Jesus Christ's death was just some sort of sick motivation. No. I am singing the song of the redeemed. I am redeemed. I put my heart and my soul in a prison for my sins and shortcomings because I thought the Holy Spirit was telling me to.

God is enough. God is enough to get me through this. Christ's sacrifice...can't be denied. It was for me and all of my siblings. He made Himself the curse. He took the burden upon Himself so that I may have life. He loved me so much and didn't even have to do that! What does He see in me? I don't deserve any of this, but I gladly take it. Lord, I thank you for forgiveness and redemption. I will for sure fall short. I have literally worn myself out and drove myself into the worst types of feelings because I felt like works save. They don't. You do. You did. You changed me. I do have this freedom. God you were trying to speak to me through Yunn last week. I felt it. You cared about me. You wanted to reach out to me. You knew what Satan was doing to me. Lord I spit on His name. I hate him. I hate what he does to me. I hate how he tries to take me away from you. I need You. I want You. My actions from now on must come from a holy conviction...not the guilt of man or Satan. Lord, you set me free.

"Embracing Accusations"
The father of lies
Coming to steal
Kill and destroy
All my hopes of being good enough
I hear him saying cursed are the ones
Who can’t abide
He’s right
Alleluia he’s right!

The devil is preaching
The song of the redeemed
That I am cursed and gone astray
I cannot gain salvation
Embracing accusation

Could the father of lies
Be telling the truth
Of God to me tonight?
If the penalty of sin is death
Then death is mine
I hear him saying cursed are the ones
Who can’t abide
He’s right
Alleluia he’s right!

Oh the devil’s singing over me
An age old song
That I am cursed and gone astray
Singing the first verse so conveniently
He’s forgotten the refrain:
Jesus saves.